Thursday, December 11, 2008

The Woes of a Pregnant Lady


Where do I begin?

Pregnancy thus far has been quite a ride.

I've gone from hovering over a toilet for hours at a time desperately waiting for the nausea to pass to manically making dozens upon dozens of cupcakes and perhaps eating the majority of them for myself to being overly emotional and crying at every little thing I find beautiful to cleaning the whole apartment in under 45 minutes and still having the time and energy to workout for 1 hour.


If I weren't pregnant, I'm sure people would like to think my mindset sometime borders dangerously close to a Britney Spears catastrophe.


I am now reaching a stage in my pregnancy where I'm thinking it would be nice if:


  • My feet quit hurting. I've never had any kind of foot pain before and now the arches of my feet and the heels ache and ache all day long.

  • My legs would quit cramping. Talk about ouch. They hurt all day no matter how many bananas I eat or how many miles I walk. At least twice a week I am awakened by a massive charlie horse in my calf that has me cringing for ten minutes while Jeff tries to massage it out. Then I limp around all day because it hurts all day.

  • My back would quit spasming. Lower back feels like a pile of spaghetti noodles at times. I've been randomly bending over to pick up a pen I've dropped only to have the back spasm and I end up on my knees because my legs gave out. Weird.

  • My bladder would quit filling up. Okay seriously. I can understand three or four trips to the bathroom, but really now, 15-20 is getting a little ridiculous. I can't keep losing sleep just to get up 3-4 times in the middle of the night to pee.

  • My REM cycle were restored. I can't sleep well...at...all. Its killing me. I go to bed at 9 pm and wake up at 6:30 am and I'm still exhausted. People tell me all the time that I look tired. Well, guess, what?! I am!!!!! I can't get a good night sleep when my legs cramp and my back spasms and I have to pee every hour or so. Oh and on top of that I go to bed cold and wake up in the middle of the night just covered in sweat after having some weird and random baby dream. Side note: Last night I had a dream I gave birth to a multi-racial child. I had people asking me left and right if it were Jeff's child and I kept screaming (yes, screaming) at them that it wouldn't be anyone else's child but no one would believe me. The night before that, it was a delivery dream where I kept walking around with a needle in my back trying to find the guy to give me my epidural.

On another side note: I understand that my REM cycle may never be fully restored now that we're having a baby. But I would just like to sleep in for once. I can do that every once in a blue moon after baby is born...right?


  • My energy came back. I want to run and take my spin classes and get my heart rate over 140! I love my baby and 100 percent value his health and well-being but MAN I have never been so bored working out as I have been this entire pregnancy. I hate walking when I feel like I should be running and I hate low intensity. Boo. I'm all about the extreme!

  • I could drink coffee again. I have never wanted my once a week caffeine fix as I have these past 6 months. Coffee would really help me a lot right now.

  • I could drink a glass of wine or have a beer. That's the one thing I've continually craved and haven't been able to satisfy. Now, I know some people think that a glass of wine once in a blue moon will not hurt the baby, but, I am not about to take any chances. I did a science fair project in 8th grade on Fetal Alcohol Syndrome with hard boiled eggs and I saw what the alcohol did to those yolks. Not pretty. Not even going to take a chance.

  • I weren't so swollen. Ya. My feet are swollen and my face is swollen and my hands are swollen. I had to get my wedding ring actually cut off my finger because we couldn't get it off. Thankfully they resized it from Large to Pregnant and it now fits on my finger and comes off when I want it to.
All complaining aside, I have thoroughly been enjoying my pregnancy. Especially now when you feel the little guy moving inside of you all day long. Its just unreal. I also like eating fairly guilt free- as long as its healthy and I LOVE the cravings for Mexican food. Yum.
**Note: The picture above in NOT our baby. I stole it from a website.

3 comments:

Danny said...

quit complaining Swan, everybody knows that pregnancy is tougher on the guys...

Sarah said...

Danny you shut your face or I'm going to come right down there to Texas and go all pregnancy hormones on you!

Elle said...

Oh no, the dreams must be upsetting at times.