Thursday, October 18, 2012

BLERG

Last night Caderyn had a tummy ache and kept waking up to run to the bathroom off an on until the wee hours of the morning.
This episode of our lives concluded with him dry heaving, hovering over the toilet for a few minutes this morning.
And then he was fine.
I was exhausted.
But he was fine.

So I chugged a cup of coffee, got everyone dressed and out the door and headed to work.

Last night, my mom said she didn't know how I did it.
Did this by myself. Raising two kids, working full time and just kept going every day.
I'm tired.
I'm frustrated.
I'm lonely.
I miss my husband.
I'm continually worried about money and bills.
I'm an adult...I guess.

I'm a single parent and yet I'm not.
I have a great support system and yet I'm alone.

But, whatever. I wouldn't do me or my family any good to just shut down.
Life goes on. Things need to be accomplished.

Our current situation is definitely teaching me certain things about life, and here are my thoughts.
1. Single parents are amazing. I have so much respect for people who are going to school, working and raising children by themselves.
2. I value the time with my husband so much more now than I used to. I also appreciate his help so much more now when he is around.
3. Now operating on my income only, I am amazed at how Jeff and I used to blow our paychecks when we were both bringing in substantial income. We could have lived like kings! And yet, we lived paycheck to paycheck spending money on silly things. Never will we do this again.
4. Budgeting is my best friend and my worst enemy.
5. I can do it all. But I also need help.

C'est la vie. Things may be hard now, but I know they will get better.

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