Tuesday, August 26, 2014


Before I left Montana, I started to write this super sentimental post about my home state. It was glorious, but then the computer I was working on went kaput and everything was lost.
Now, having lived in Phoenix for all of two weeks, I've had some good time to reflect on not only what we've left behind, but also what we have ahead of us.
I adore Montana. Everything there, in my opinion, is just better. People are nicer. The weather is nicer (even when it is snowing and raining). The outdoor space to play in is amazing. The beer is above and beyond fantastic. Everything just slows down a little bit and it feels wonderful.
I miss Montana. Every time I'm away from Montana I miss it. When I lived in Arizona while going to high school I couldn't wait for that next year that brought me closer and closer to my college goals of going to the University of Montana.
Once I got back there, I never wanted to leave. Up til now I've managed to live and enjoy my home state for the last eleven years. Now that I am away, I miss it terribly. I miss the calm and lazy days. I miss being only a short drive away from my grandparents, aunts/uncles, and friends. I miss the cooler temperatures. I miss how easy everything was to drive to. I miss the big blue sky. I miss how the air just smells cleaner in Montana. I miss the smaller crowds.
I think, no matter where I am in life, if I am away from Montana, I will always miss it.
Montana is the foundation that breathed life into me and made me who I am.
No matter where I am, I have made a vow to always return.
And I will.
It may take a few years, but we will be back one day for good.
For now though, we have adventures to embark upon.

And you know, I used to hate Arizona. I always liked coming back to visit and see my parents, but I always swore up and down I would never live here. It is too hot for me.
Now that I'm living here again, I don't mind it.
It is bigger and more crowded. Traffic is terrible and I'm usually stressed after a ten minute drive.
People don't engage with you as easily and they aren't as kind in random situations.

But there are stores. So many stores to choose from! So many food choices and shopping choices and basically all kinds of choices. I've recently discovered a love for Trader Joe's and Sprouts. I've been eyeballing that Nordstrom Rack just two miles down the road (don't worry Jeff, I'm saving my money).
And there are multiple options to keep your children engaged. We have zoos and museums and an abundance of fantastic parks. We have a swimming pool and a gated fence so I don't have to worry too much about my kids playing in the back yard (our last house wasn't 100 percent fenced in). The weather is definitely hot, but there is a certain beauty about it. Arizona does have some amazing sunsets.
Caderyn gets to go to a fantastic school where we've been welcomed with open arms and met some wonderful people.
I get to work and spend time with my children throughout the week which is an amazing blessing.
I get the chance to branch out and meet new people and reconnect with friends who still live here.
And, the most important thing of all, I get to spend a year with my parents.
It still doesn't feel real, it still just feels like a vacation. I get to sleep in (not all the time), and go to the gym, and I have two extra sets of hands to help me with my boys.
It. Is. Wonderful.
So, as hard as moving away from Montana was, I feel like we made the right decision.
We will make this year fun and I look forward to the memories to come.

Here is a poem someone sent me on my last full day of work that I thought accurately summed up how I felt about leaving work, moving, and starting a new life chapter.

The Guest House
This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.
A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.
Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they are a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still, treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.
The dark thought, the shame, the malice.
meet them at the door laughing and invite them in.
Be grateful for whatever comes.
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.
-- Jelaluddin Rumi,
    translation by Coleman Barks

1 comment:

B, in the Great Funkk said...

Trader Joe's. Jealous Much!